The Horror of Meth: Before & After Photos from the Daily Mail

The Horror of Meth: Before & After Photos from the Daily Mail

OH, SWEET CHRIST ON A CRACKER. Click on the link above this post, and you, too, can be freaked the fuck out by the absolutely horrific impact that meth has on a person’s physical appearance over time.

Somehow, the poster didn’t realize that the girl in the first photo has clearly been in a terrible fire in addition to being a meth addict. After all, it may be a nasty drug, but meth doesn’t make your face melt off like that/turn you into Sloth from “The Goonies” – unless your lab exploded while you were taking care of business, which is what I’d bet money happened to this poor lass. Her hair still looks good, though.

Moving swiftly along, I’d like you to scroll down and have a look at the second woman who is profiled. This unfortunate soul’s meth use somehow transformed her into a very bruised-looking coyote/human hybrid (a cuman). Now, let’s be honest – she was no Elle Macpherson to begin with, but DAMN, what a difference a few years of meth addiction makes. I literally screamed when I saw her photos.

The last photo set that I found profoundly disturbing is the one of of the guy who started out looking like he could have been in an Abercrombie ad. His meth addiction turned him into someone who looks like he died three months ago and is currently trying to break in through your window to eat your brains. Also, he seems to only have one little buck tooth left. It’s an unfortunate thing to lose all of your teeth except for one front tooth…but it’s probably more unfortunate to have the awful monkey of meth addiction on your back for the rest of your life.

On Courtney Stodden and her Grey-Faced Husband

On Courtney Stodden and her Grey-Faced Husband

Courtney Stodden, the 18-year-old child bride of some old dude who was apparently on Lost or something, has become a fixture on the gossip blogs for her undeniably classy wardrobe of gold lame, 7″ lucite stripper heels, and a chest that Tori Spelling would kill a man for. She claims to be ‘the real deal,’ completely devoid of any surgical enhancement, but on a scale of ‘Normal Human to Amanda Lepore,’ Stoddard comes in at a solid ‘Jackie Stallone.’ Most recently, she attended some event for the King of Thailand (seriously WTF), and here in the above link are some photos of how subdued and subtly chic she looked that night. What I really can’t get over is the fact that her husband (HUSBAND!) is straight up GREY. His pigeon-colored teeth match his ash-colored face, and the overall effect is that he looks like a gargoyle in an ill-fitting satin shirt and Steve Madden platform shoes. Imagine having to get in bed next to that every night! Actually, he probably sleeps in a coffin, so I bet Courtney gets the whole bed to herself. It’s the little things, I guess.

Much ado about Corpse Flowers

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/03/19/corpse-flower-blooms-cornell-titan-arum-plant_n_1364302.html

Apparently, the Corpse Flower at Cornell University is currently in bloom. I don’t really understand why everyone makes such a fuss about Corpse Flowers. I mean, seriously, you have to wait ten years for them to flower, and your reward for being patient is getting to stand in a room that stinks of rotten flesh and look at a plant. That sounds gross and horrible, not awesome and fun. If I were dating someone who was really into the idea of seeing the Corpse Flower, I’d be a little worriedAfter all, Criminal Minds has taught me that more often than not, people who are down with smelling a dead body turn out to have ladies stuffed in their crawl spaces.