In which Caroline wonders what makes a girl become “the girl who crowd surfs at concerts.”

Last night, I went to see “Sublime” (in quotation marks because without Brad Nowell, it’s really not Sublime). Don’t ask me why. I figured it would be a fun trip down memory lane – an inebriated dance party with attractive suburban bros and their overweight, cargo-short-wearing female friends. I was mostly right; there were a…

Read more In which Caroline wonders what makes a girl become “the girl who crowd surfs at concerts.”

In which Caroline diagnoses a nut on OkCupid by doing a textual analysis of his profile.

I just stumbled upon an OkCupid profile that consists of one photograph of a male torso, taken with an iPhone, and this self-summary: Every rumor begins with a grain of truth. Behind closed and guarded doors. Young, beautiful, free. Like a handful of new gods. Fantasies do come true. Discretion is the only rule. Whaaaaat? Here’s my…

Read more In which Caroline diagnoses a nut on OkCupid by doing a textual analysis of his profile.

In which Caroline discusses “The Power of Me.”

The other night, I was looking at notebooks in Barnes & Noble when I overheard the following conversation: Dumpy, middle-aged single woman with a swollen, tear-stained face: Excuse me. Can you please direct me to the Self-Improvement section? Sullen, twenty-something-year-old employee: The what? DMASWWASTSF: The Self-Improvement section. Self-help? Improving self-worth? I’m looking for a book called The…

Read more In which Caroline discusses “The Power of Me.”

In which Caroline tells you about the car accident she maybe could’ve died in this morning.

This morning on my way to work, an 100-foot-long electrical cable flew out of the back of the truck in front of my cab and got twisted around the cab’s tires and undercarriage, which made us swerve dangerously, almost spin out, and then stop short in the middle of Madison Avenue.  Do I even have to talk…

Read more In which Caroline tells you about the car accident she maybe could’ve died in this morning.