Daily Aggravation 51: Unwieldy Rollerbladers

I experienced a new level of disgust and irritation today when I was peacefully walking down the sidewalk, headphones in, and almost got mowed down by a frizzy-haired, middle-aged woman on rollerblades. She came out of nowhere, staggering quickly towards me in an unwieldy fashion like she was doing an old-timey slapstick routine. From her helmet, ankle/knee/wrist/elbow guards and mouthpiece, I could tell that she had invested a good amount of money in looking so embarrassingly stupid and neurotic. Her socks, which looked like they were thigh-highs that had been bunched up and then pulled down, were neon yellow and glowing in the sunlight.

At the last minute, she made a sharp turn and headed across the street in the other direction, her arms flailing as she just barely maintained control over her portly body. A delivery guy on a bike and I watched her leave, and as he turned to me, we shared a look that said, “Hey, bitch – it’s 1:00pm, the sun is out, and we can see you too fucking well already. Next time, leave the day-glo socks at home.”

Published in: on February 1, 2013 at 1:37 pm  Comments (1)  
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  1. Hey! When you are a moving object not entirely in control of your motion or direction, you can’t ever be too cautious. I’m all for people being too visible rather than the opposite extreme. I almost hit a kid on a bike a few nights ago – he was wearing all black, and his bike had zero reflective devices or other light sources on it. He was practically invisible. (It didn’t help that he was on the side walk going the wrong direction but that’s a separate issue.)


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